Ep 13. Secret Admirers vs. Public Engagers: Why your content is working (even when it doesn’t look like it)

Ep 13. Secret Admirers vs. Public Engagers: Why your content is working (even when it doesn’t look like it)

If you’ve ever posted content that you’ve poured your heart and soul into, but you’ve got barely any engagement, and then you’re just sitting there wondering if there’s any point, this episode is gonna change everything for you.

Because while you’re sitting there questioning whether your content is making any impact, your next best client might be consuming every single post, taking mental notes and getting ready to make that significant investment with you.

They’re just not telling you about it (but they will eventually).

A very warm welcome back to Quiet Confidence. I’m Anita Popat, and today we’re diving into what I call your secret admirers versus your public engagers.

And honestly, understanding the difference is gonna completely change how you think about what successful content means.

Now, when I talk about secret admirers, I’m talking about those people who are consuming your content, taking in everything that you say, but they’re just not telling you about it.

Meaning, that they’re probably not liking, commenting, or sharing your posts. Some people call them lurkers, but I don’t like that name. I think secret admirers sounds much nicer. So that’s the term I’m gonna use throughout this episode.

What I want you to understand is while you are sitting there refreshing your phone every two seconds, and wondering, what’s the point? I’m just gonna give up.

Please don’t, your next potential client is probably waiting for you to post something.

They might be saving those posts, screenshotting them, or even forwarding them on to other people.

Honestly, there was one time I met this lady at networking event, and she said, oh, I love this post so much I’ve printed it and stuck it on my wall.

And I was like, whaaaat?! If I hadn’t gone to that networking event I would’ve never have known.

Just liking or commenting is good, but actually making the effort to print it out and stick it on your wall, that’s next level.

 Just have faith that your content is doing some good in the world and it’s reaching the people who need it.

Another good example is when I launched my signature program, Silent Storm, just over two years ago now.

I was posting about it, constantly, sharing all the details, explaining exactly who it was for, how it worked, and then the day before we were due to start, I did something that I never do, which was doing an impromptu Instagram live.

I think it was mid-morning. Like 10 o’clock. Terrible timing.

And I just went on to [00:02:00] share my enthusiasm and my excitement for this new course that I was building, and on that live I asked one simple question, which was “how long are you gonna keep winging your marketing?”

And I’m never gonna forget. Literally as I pressed end on the live stream, this Stripe notification popped up and it was from someone whose name I’d never heard of, but they just paid me to come into Silent Storm and she later told me that was the most she’d ever spent on marketing.

But I didn’t even recognize her name. She’d never liked a post, never commented, never given me any indication that she was even seeing my content. But she was obviously there the whole time, watching everything. And then that one question at the last moment pushed her to take that action.

So while I was questioning whether anyone even was watching or cared about what I was sharing, she was making nearly a thousand pound buying decision – and she did at the last minute.

Another thing that’s completely changed how I think about content engagement nowadays is something that happens to me all the time when I’m at networking or events .

I get people come up to me saying, “Oh, I love your content”, or “You’re so authentic, you just say it how it is, and your posts always capture exactly what I’m thinking, but I never know how to articulate”.

And every time I’m genuinely surprised because I’m thinking, well, why didn’t you like or comment on it then?! (joking tone)

On a serious note, a lot of people have never given me any indication that they’re even seeing my content, let alone connecting with it.

And this is exactly why your secret admirers are so much more valuable than your public engagers, because they’re not just scrolling for entertainment.

They’re probably looking at you as a potential solution to their problems more likely to become clients, which is what we want at the end of the day. Right?

So I’ve been doing this work for over six years now, and and honestly, I’ve developed my strategies for converting followers to clients through trial and error.

So I started with a general four week course covering marketing basics for all types of people.

But then I niched specifically into helping introverts and created Silent Storm, which was about two and a half years ago now.

And I developed that partly because I was saying the same thing over and over again to those different people.

So I knew there was a roadmap I wanted to take people on, but it was also influenced heavily by what my beta group were actually asking for.

And I loved creating every module, like a [00:04:00] week ahead based on what they were saying.

And what they were asking for was what I really wanted to include, which was amazing. It was all about the behind the scenes work.

So the market research, the voice of customer analysis, how to have strategic conversations in the dms, how to grow your audience, how to convert followers to clients.

So all of that foundational stuff that actually builds a sustainable business, but doesn’t really look impressive on social media because it’s all like in the backend.

A lot of my clients are solopreneurs who want to build a marketing strategy that works with their personality and not against it. Which means that they’re naturally secret admirers themselves, they’re wired to do this deep research and, not only consume, but create content thoughtfully as well, but they just didn’t know how to do it, so Silent Storm was a perfect bridge for this.

So your sweet spot clients are probably a reflection of how you do things as well.

And this is where I think most of us get it completely wrong because there’s so much noise out there saying that engagement equals interest, which is true to a certain extent because yes, we need to, reach people and we need to get known.

But you’ve also gotta look at how your sweet spot clients behave online.

For me, and maybe for you, if your clients are introverts too, they’re on the quieter side so they might not be inclined to engage as publicly as other people would.

And it’s important to know that because then you can stop refreshing that phone every two seconds and just have faith that your content is reaching the people that it needs to reach.

Let’s talk about who your secret admirers actually are, because I bet you’re picturing them all wrong.

They’re not gonna be liking and commenting and sharing your posts. They’re gonna be a bit more thoughtful about it. So they might go in with the lens of, does this person get me and can they solve my problems?

If they see a piece of your content, they might save your post to read later when they’ve got a bit more time, or just follow you for a while to really study your approach and understand if the way you think and work aligns with their values. That’s certainly what my audience do.

They’ll rarely comment publicly because maybe they’re too busy implementing what you shared.

Or, and this is what most of my audience are like, and me as well, they’ll probably prefer to reach out privately when they’re ready to take action.

Which is why on my call to actions, if I’m using the comment word thing, [00:06:00] I might say, comment this word or DM me. And more recently I’ve just been saying, DM me or go to this link.

Because not everyone wants to share what they’re doing publicly, and that’s okay.

These are the kind of nuances you need to know about how your audience behaves so that you can create content that feels easy for them to take the next step rather than making them feel more exposed.

And we’ve also gotta think your secret admirers are valuable because they might be in active research mode, which means they’re looking for solutions right now.

They might already have the budget and the decision making power, so, they’re gonna be looking at you and be genuinely interested in how you approach your subject and whether they can connect with your style.

So let that be your motivation to keep posting when you think no one’s looking.

Now your public engagers are totally different.

So there’re often other business owners in your network, fellow creators, your cheerleaders and supporters, and they’re gonna comment to build relationships, to get seen by your audience, to position themselves as being part of the conversation. And they’re valuable too, because they’re gonna help with your reach, right?

And they can become genuine advocates of your work. So make sure you lean into community over competition as well, because all of this works together like a content ecosystem.

Where most people mess up is that we want to optimize all of our content for the public engagers because they’re the ones that we can see and hear from and other people can see and hear.

Maybe for our ego if we want more likes and comments, but while you are wishing for all this, our secret admirers are consuming our content in complete silence and are probably deciding whether they want to buy from you or not and we want the latter.

Because that’s better for our bank balance. Let’s face it.

So how do you create content that actually serves both audiences?

Let me share what I think works really well.

We can take a dual purpose approach to a post. So you can lead with something actionable that your secret admirers can take and use immediately.

And then you can end with something that invites a discussion for your public engagers.

For example, let’s say you’re sharing advice about LinkedIn headlines. Um. Shameless plug look at the past episode if you wanna know how to optimize your profile, you might say, here’s my three [00:08:00] step process for writing LinkedIn, headlines that actually work.

You might go into what makes a good LinkedIn profile so that gives your secret admirer something that they can take away and implement straight away.

But then you might end with a question or a discussion point, something like what’s the most confusing LinkedIn headline you’ve ever seen? Or something like that.

What happens there is that your secret admirers get the complete process that they can implement right away and your public engagers get question to get into the conversation.

So that’s one post and you’ve served both of those audiences.

And you can mix the call to actions up as well. So instead of always saying, what do you think, you can try things like save this for when you’re ready to update your profile or screenshot this process.

You’re not assuming that they want to talk about it, you are actually acknowledging how they like to consume content.

Cool. Now let’s talk about actually measuring success, because if you are only looking at likes and comments, you are missing the whole picture.

Here’s what I want you to start tracking above the likes and comments.

Look at how many people are actually saving your posts. So this means that they’re keeping your content for reference.

How many people are clicking on your website link? That means that they’re doing a bit more research into your world.

What are your story views like from people who don’t usually engage with your posts? So, these are people who are already following you, but they’re staying connected because they’re looking at what you’re posting on your stories.

And have a look at the content that’s got you the most dms. ‘ ‘Cause for me, this is where my secret admirers are most comfortable and most importantly, it’s where my content turns into inquiries, which is the biggest metric of all at the end of the day, isn’t it?

So go back through your posts and just have a look at the ones that generated the conversations in your dms or the ones that people might have mentioned in calls or things, and you might be shocked to discover that your worst performing post, in inverted commas was actually one of your most effective ones when it came to lead gen.

And more often than not, if you’re selling something, those posts are naturally not gonna get any engagement. So likes and comments, because you want people to get into your dms or buy whatever you’ve told ’em to do, so you’re not gonna like something and go and buy it as well.

Ideally, they’re just gonna go and buy it, so keep those more meaningful metrics in mind rather than the vanity ones.

Because you could have a post that got three [00:10:00] likes, but it got saved like 80 times.

But it was also one that built trust with someone who hired you two months later. So this is the kind of data that actually matters for your business.

Speaking about private conversations. I wanna talk about your DM strategy.

Now. Hear me out before you roll your eyes. I’m not gonna tell you to bash out 50 dms a day. been there, done that, got the t-shirt, wouldn’t recommend it. Um, that was because I was a good girl in following what my coach told me. Hard fail.

Anyway, let me share how I do this in practice and if you’re anything like me, this might suit your personality too.

So I know my audience and they’re introverts who prefer private conversations over public comments. So instead of using the typical comment a word below call to actions that put people on the spot.

I usually end a post with dm me, and that gets me responses and it starts conversations in the dms. They’re not asking for more free content they’re ready to move forward. And they’re saying where’s the link to sign up?

I also do something I call the red carpet welcome in Silent Storm.

That’s a simple strategic hello message for new followers.

And I’ve had loads of people enroll into Silent Storm because of this one simple message. Because they probably needed just an easy, private way to start the conversation and I’m not sure if they would’ve come in if I didn’t make the first move.

You never know where a simple hello is gonna take you. So I’m not talking about those spammy messages that you get on LinkedIn saying, hi, how’s your day going? Just genuine. Like how you would talk to someone, like a normal human being, saying hello with no agenda, with no, I’m gonna sell to you. None of that icky stuff.

How would you welcome people into your home? Or if you had a real life shop and you’re behind the counter.

If someone walked through the door, you wouldn’t just ignore them, right?

You’d say hello, you’d welcome them into your world and make sure that they feel comfortable.

So that’s all I like to do with the red carpet welcome to make my followers feel seen. And that normally encourages people to support your content going forward as well.

Before we wrap up, let me share the biggest mistakes I see people make with this stuff.

First of all, don’t change your entire content strategy based on one post that didn’t get any engagement.

Just because something didn’t land or get comments or whatever your metric for success is, it doesn’t mean that it didn’t [00:12:00] work, your secret admirers might have loved it.

Secondly, don’t assume silence means that no one cares. Your secret admirers care deeply.They’re just not being vocal about it.

And thirdly. Don’t just create content that’s designed to get comments. Because if every post is asking for engagement, you are potentially ignoring the people who actually want to hire you.

And then finally don’t get so caught up in vanity metrics that you forget to track what actually matters, which is inquiries, conversations, and conversions, because unless you wanna be an influencer, that’s what we’re in business for. Right? To get sales.

So moving forward, keep both audiences in mind.

Your secret admirers need actionable content they can consume privately, and that content that makes them feel really like, oh my God, they’re in my head.

And your public engagers probably need opportunities to join the conversation. And you can serve both when you are intentional about it.

Remember, your secret admirers are watching everything you post. They’re learning from you, they’re implementing your advice, they’re probably talking about you in rooms that you’re not in, and they’re probably gonna be your next best client.

So stop optimizing your content for the people who are the loudest in your world, and start creating content that serves the people who are actually ready to invest in what you’ve got to offer.

Your goal isn’t to turn every secret admirer into a public engager. Your goal is to create content that’s so valuable and makes your sweet spot client feel so seen that when they’re ready to solve your problem, you are the obvious choice, because they connect with you and they like the style in which you present your expertise.

So they might never comment on your post, but they will remember exactly where they learned that strategy that changed everything for them.

And when they’re ready to take action, guess who they’re gonna call?

And I’m not just saying this, I would say like 95% of my clients are secret admirers. So I’m saying this from experience because most of my content gets what looks like low engagement on the face of things.

But that’s not what’s happening behind the scenes. I’m still having conversations, and I’m still attracting and working with the most dreamy clients behind the scenes, and that’s all because of my marketing.

Keep going and if you’d like to work with me, one-to-one inside Silent Storm, [00:14:00] you can click on the link to find out what all that’s about.

As always, thank you so much for listening.

If you did enjoy this episode, please rate, review, and share with your network.

Every little helps so we can help more people embrace their quiet confidence and make a loud impact with their work.

Speak to you soon.