You’ve spent time on a post, you’ve put yourself out there, and then it just goes quiet. I’ll hold my hands up, I used to be the one refreshing the screen every 2 minutes, and then getting the urge to delete the post because it wasn’t getting any love. And I know it happens to so many of us, because it’s really easy to look at a post nobody’s interacted with and think, “Oh no, no one’s liked this, so that must mean no one likes me.”
But I want you to sit with this for a second, because low engagement on social media isn’t a verdict on you or your personality.
It’s just information, and once you start looking at it that way, you can separate yourself from the data.
When a quiet post starts to feel personal
This came up recently on one of my Silent Storm coaching calls, and I thought it was worth talking about here.
The thing my client wanted to change whilst working together was separating herself from her content. She didn’t want to see a quiet post, decide it meant people didn’t like her, and then get discouraged and not post at all for ages.
She wanted to look at her social media results in the way she looks at her website stats – getting curious about the data and not making it personal.
I know most of us do the opposite with social media, because it does feel a bit more personal, right?
You’ve spent time on it and you’re putting yourself out there, so when there’s a lack of engagement it’s easy to think people don’t like you.
But it’s not that. It could literally be anything.
It could be that the algorithm hasn’t shown your post to that many people, or your ideal clients weren’t online that day, or (as I always say) people are still looking but not reacting.
Content is an experiment, not a verdict
The mindset I want you to have is that content is an experiment. Each post is just a piece of data. The more content you create, the more data you get, so if you try one angle and it really works, it means people like that way of saying it, so you do more of that.
If another angle isn’t quite right, that’s just data as well. It’s not “people didn’t like me”, it’s more “maybe I need to tweak something”, but if you don’t post anything, you’re not going to know.
Decide what your social media is actually for
Now, to treat something as data, you need to know what you’re measuring it against, and I think this is where a lot of people go wrong as well.
If you don’t know what the post is for, as in do you want it to grow your audience, are you using it to nurture, or is it to sell something, then likes tend to become the default scoreboard. And to be honest, they’re the weakest signal you’re going to get.
So before you judge anything, ask yourself what the purpose of social media is in your business (or if it’s not social media, the purpose of the content you’re posting wherever you’re posting it).
For me, social media is there to get me visible and get people onto my email list. So when a post goes quiet, I’m not asking whether people liked it, I’m looking at whether it’s putting me in front of anyone new.
Am I getting new followers, has anyone signed up to my list or listened to my podcast? If people did any of those things, then it’s working, even if it looks like “nothing” in terms of engagement, because it’s not nothing if people are signing up from a link in your bio or getting in touch in your DMs.
Your goals might be different, and that’s fine. The point is to decide what your social media is for, so you know what to look at.
A post with 6 likes that sends 3 people to your email list has done it’s job. A post with 200 likes that sends nobody anywhere is a nice feeling, but not much else, because we’re all about making your content get clients, right?
The signals that matter more than likes
The signals you’re looking for are actually quieter than likes. It’s things like:
- Did anyone reply?
- Did someone DM you about it?
- Did a client mention it on a call?
- Did someone save it?
- Did your reach go up, or did more people visit your profile?
And then there are the people who never engage at all, who’ll watch you for weeks and then land in your DMs or on a call and say, “I’ve been following you for ages.”
I’ve had loads of those!
If I was judging my content on likes and let that stop me from posting, I would have missed about 90% of my clients!
That’s really what encourages me to keep going, because I know people are watching, even when no one’s engaging. It’s probably the same for you too.
Ask yourself better questions
When something goes quiet, the first question in your head is probably “what does that say about me?”, and that one never goes anywhere helpful. So try these instead.
- What was the post for?
- Did it do that, even a little bit?
- What could you change or try next time?
That last one doesn’t need to be big.
- You can try a different hook
- The same idea in a different format
- A different call to action
- Write in a different style
Change one thing at a time, because if you change the hook, the format and the posting time all at once, you’re not going to know which one made the difference.
That’s what makes it an experiment rather than just throwing spaghetti at the wall.
We’re basically looking for patterns, to see what’s encouraging people to do the thing that helps you reach your goal.
Sometimes the answer is that it did exactly what you needed it to do, but you just didn’t notice. And if it didn’t, you’ve still got something to work with, rather than making it a story about yourself.
5 minute review once a week (and then close the app)
If you want to make this low lift, just do a five-minute review once a week.
Look at what you posted and see which one got the most replies or DMs, which one got you some followers, and which one got you link taps, so you can start to create a picture of the type of content that’s working for you.
And then close the app. That’s the important bit.
If you’ve got a set time to look, you don’t need to be checking every two seconds, and because you’re going in with that headspace, you’ll look with more of a scientist mindset rather than an “Oh my God, this makes me feel like crap” mindset.
Also, try not to go straight from checking your own stats to scrolling everyone else’s, because you’re going to be comparing your stuff to someone else’s highlight reel, and that’s not data. It’s just a way to make you feel rubbish, but you already know that, right?
If you’d love some support working out what your content is for, and getting it to actually bring you clients in a way that feels doable as an introvert, that’s exactly what we do together in Silent Storm. You can find out more here.
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